The child’s indulgence also has a lesson

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It needs rules

From the time they start walking, children must learn that not everything happens according to their wishes, say child psychology specialists. Thus, it will be easier for them, as they grow, to adapt to various situations. Set limits and rules for your child and teach him that if he doesn’t follow them, he will suffer the consequences.

For example, make him sit on a chair in the corner for five minutes, confiscate his favorite toy or stop giving him certain privileges. Very likely, the little one will start to cry, because he is not used to such an approach. It’s important not to give in and make him understand that this will happen every time he doesn’t follow the rules.

Don’t let him negotiate

Many times, children enter into negotiations with adults in order to get things the way they want. Make him understand that there are rules set by you that he cannot negotiate, such as bedtime. Let him choose only when it comes to the clothes he will wear, the book you read, the type of candy for breakfast or the toys he can take with him for a walk.

In time, he will know the difference between the “areas” in which he can choose and the “fixed” ones. 2-3 year olds don’t need to explain the rules to them, they just need to know about their existence. The 4-5 year olds are starting to rebel, but they still can’t understand why they have to respect them.

Only at the age of 14-15 can you talk to him like an adult and establish certain limits together. The more permissive you are with the child in his first years of life, the more demanding he will become as he grows.

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Ignore it when appropriate

Crying is a very common thing in children. But it’s good to react in one way when he cries because he needs something and to have a different attitude when he does it as a whim, as a treat or because he really wants a teddy bear.

Help him when he cries because he’s hit himself, he’s in pain, he’s hungry or afraid, but ignore him when he’s whimpering, as long as he doesn’t become very violent or can’t hurt himself, intentionally or not.

Don’t be afraid to say NO

A spoiled child always wants to get what he wants when he asks. But it would be nice to hear the word NO from time to time. Even if you forbid him to do certain things and he gets angry at the moment, it does not mean that he will love you less as a parent.

An American pediatrician states, related to spoiled children, that if you always get along well with your child, it means that something is wrong. Always choose the good solution in the long term, not the short term, even if you don’t like to see him upset.

Doctor Click! advises you

Anca-Elena Vințeanu psychologist [email protected]

Usually, the cause of indulgence can be found in parents or grandparents. They, out of the desire to give their child everything that is best and most beautiful, forget that sometimes the child is not ready to receive all those things that they offer.

Thus, the child no longer knows what the rules and limits are. The advice for parents who have spoiled children is to impose rules and limits, to be respected by both them and the little ones. If this behavior is not corrected in time, it will degenerate and be the basis for various conflicts between the child and the adult.

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