Every teenager wants to go to the party and every time you forbid them, they say “But everyone else goes, why can’t I?!” Just like that, why isn’t yours allowed? It’s true that just thinking that something bad could happen to him gives you chills and you’d prefer him to stay at home, but that’s not possible either.
If you always deny him this pleasure, you will only push him away from you or, even worse, “force” him to sneak out of the house to have fun. It is better to choose the safe parties for him and try to avoid the others. Total freedom is not indicated either, because the child still needs your advice to make the right decisions and to stay away from dangers. Who supervises them?
Guide yourself by one rule: let him go to the party only when he has proven to you that he can take care of himself and when you trust that he will not do things that will put him in danger. Ideally, the party should take place as close to home as possible. If this is not possible, still make sure that at least one trusted adult will be there, for example the party thrower’s parents, an older sibling or another relative. Until your child turns 16, the claim is not exaggerated.
It’s safer in two
It’s best for him and reassuring for you to go to the party with your brother or sister or best friend. When leaving home, make sure he takes his cell phone with him and keeps it open at all times so that you can contact him if needed. Don’t bother him with phone calls every five minutes. It would also be advisable to know which young people will be present at the party. Terriblys can be very persuasive, and the other kids can end up doing dangerous or unnatural things just to keep up with the world.
If the party takes place at your home, you can better control what happens. In addition, you can see what kind of friends he has and get a clear idea of his surroundings. If everything seems fine to you, you will be calmer in the future. And if not, you’ll be able to intervene before something happens. That’s why it would be good to let him throw a party at your house from time to time, even if it means extra work for you.
If he is under 15, he should be back in the house by 11 p.m. To make sure nothing happens to him on the way, you could go pick him up from the party. The older ones can spend more time with friends, provided they don’t go to parties every weekend. From the age of 16, he can return home alone, if you have made sure that he has money for a taxi.
What do you do if they don’t listen to you?
Didn’t answer the phone or didn’t come back at the appointed time? You have to punish him to prove to him that you mean it and that he can’t go to parties if you can’t trust him.
You could, for example, deny him access to the computer for a week or two. On the other hand, if he keeps all the agreements, you can let him party longer next time, if he asks for it.
