Start preparing it before the second child is born. The best time for a discussion would be 2-3 months before the birth. If he finds out too soon, he will be anxious for his brother or sister to be born, and if he is told too late, perhaps even when the new family member is a little old and comes home, the child will not be able to adapt to the new changes.
Prepare him for the arrival of the little brother
Involve him in the preparations before the birth and letting him choose the baby’s name, the place where his crib will be, the new toys for the little one. Go to ultrasounds together a few times. That way he will be able to see the little one and hear his heartbeat.
Before the birth, read as much as possible about weighting conflicts between children! Quarrels will be inevitable between brothers. Avoid calling the baby “new baby” or “mommy’s baby” and better call him brother or sister.
From the first days you bring the baby home, the older child starts to feel neglected. Patiently, explain to him that when he was younger he was also helpless, that’s why he needed more care from those around him.
Reassure him that you love him just as much, even if you have to spend more time with the little one. Tell him that if he is well taken care of, he will grow and they can play together.
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Train him to protect the baby, but don’t leave them alone together. If he hits the little one, intervene quickly, and when you see that he is behaving nicely with him, praise him, hug him. Show him your love more often through gestures of affection, through a little time spent alone with him where you read to him or play.
When you can’t participate in an activity you used to do together, avoid saying it’s because the younger child needs to be taken care of. Instead of “We can’t go to the park because your little brother needs to be changed and fed!”, explain: “We’ll go after you eat or sleep for lunch.”
